Boris Vian: The Ants

Boris Vian

The Ants

Translated by Rawdon Corbett

WE arrived this morning and we weren’t exactly given a welcome because there was no one on the beach but piles od dead men, or piles of bits of men, tanks and blown-up lorries. Bullets were coming from all round, and personally I don’t care for this sort of untidiness. We jumped into the water, but it was deeper than it looked and I slipped on a tin can. The chap just behind me had three quarters of his face blown off by a bullet and I kept the can as a souvenir. I put the bits of his face into my helmet and gave them to him. He went off to get treatment, but it seems he must have gone the wrong way because he went into the water until he was out of his depth and I don’t think he could see well enough at the bottom to avoid getting lost.

THEN I ran off in the right direction and arrived just in time to get someone’s leg right in my face. I tried to swear at the owner, but the mine had only left pieces of him, which it was impossible to get any response out of, so I ignored his gesture and went on.

The metres further I met up with three other lads who were behind a block of concrete shooting at a corner of the wall higher up. they were sweating and soaking wet and I must have been in eh same state, so I knelt down and shot too. The lieutenant came back. He was holding his head in his hands and there was a stream of red running from his mouth. He didn’t look too happy and quickly went to lie down on the sand with his mouth open and his arms sticking out in front of him he must have made a real mess of the sand. It was one of the few places that had stayed clean.

From his point our boat, which had been beached, looked completely idiotic at first, and then it didn’t even look like a boat at all when the two shells fell on it. I didn’t like that because two of my friends were still inside it, with the bullets which had hit them when they stood up to jump still inside them. I tapped the three of them who were shooting with me on the shoulder and said: ‘Come on, let’s go.’’

Naturally, I made them go first and I must have had second sight because the first and second men were both shot down by the two people who were sniping at us and so there was only one left in front of me. poor sod, as soon as he’d get rid of the worst of the two, the other one just had time to kill him before I took care of him in his turn.

Those two bastards behind the corner of the wall had a machine gun and heaps of cartridges. I turned it in the opposite direction and opened fire but I stopped quickly because the noise was deafening and also it had just jammed. They have to be adjusted not to shoot in the wrong direction.

Here I was more or less undisturbed. From high up on the beach one could enjoy the view. The sea was smoking everywhere and the water was spouting high up into the air. Also, you could see the flashes made by the firing of the battleships, and their shells passed over your head with a funny sort of muffled noise, like a cylinder of deep sound boring through the atmosphere.

The captain arrived. There were just eleven of us left. He said it wasn’t many but that we’d manage. Later the others arrived. For the present he made us dig holes. I thought they were for sleeping in, but no, we had to get into them and keep shooting.

Luckily the air was clearing. Now there were great swarms landing from the boats, but the fish swam between their legs to get revenge for all the commotion we were causing and most of the men fell into the water and came up again choking and gasping for all they were worth. Some didn’t come up at all and floated away in the waves and the captain ordered us to put the machine-gun nest, which had just started firing again, out of action at once, by moving up under cover of the tank.

WE got behind the tank. I was last because I don’t trust the brakes on those machines. Even so, it’s easier to walk behind a tank because you don’t need to bother any more about getting tangled up in the barbed wire and the stakes in the ground just topple over. But I didn’t like its way of squashing the corpses, with a sort of noise which it’s difficult to recall exactly – at the time it’s quite distinctive. Three minutes later the tank set off a mine and started burning. Two of the occupants couldn’t get out and the third could, but one of his feet stayed behind in the tank and I don’t know if he noticed before he died. Anyway, two of his shells had already fallen on the machine-gun nest, smashing up the occupants and their eggs too. The soldiers who were still landing found things slightly improved, but then an anti-tank battery started blasting away in its turn and at least twenty men fell into the water. Personally, I went down flat on my stomach. From this position I could see them firing if I leaned forward a little. The wreck of the burning tank gave me some protection and I aimed carefully. The gunner fell in convulsions. I must have hit him a bit low but I couldn’t finish him off as I had to get the other three first. I had a hard job. Luckily the noise of the burning tank stopped me from hearing them howling – I’d made a mess of killing the third one too. On top of this things were exploding and smoking on all sides. I gave my eyes a good rub to be able to see better as I was being blinded by sweat and the captain came back. He could only use his left arm.

‘Can you bandage my right arm very close to my body?’ I said yes and started to wrap him up in bandages and then both his feet left the ground at the same time and he fell on top of me because a grenade had landed just behind him. His body went stiff at once: it seems that happens if you die when you’re very tired. In any case it made it easier to lift him off me. and then I must have fallen asleep and when I woke up the noise was further away and one of these chaps with red crosses all round his helmet was pouring me a coffee.

2

Afterwards we headed inland and we tried to put into practice the advice our instructors had given us and the things we had learned on manoeuvres. Mike’s jeep came back just now. Fred was driving and Mike was in two pieces; they’d run into some wire. They’re just fitting steel blades on the front of the other jeeps because it’s too hot to drive with our windscreen up. there’s still shooting all over the place and we go on patrol after patrol. I think we’ve advanced a bit too quickly and we’re having difficulty in keeping in touch with our supplies. They’ve smashed up at least nine of our tanks for us this morning and a funny thing happened. One chap’s bazooka flew away when he fired it and he stayed hooked onto it by the sling. He waited till he was forty metres up and then came down by his parachute. I think we’re going to have to ask. For reinforcements because I’ve just heard a noise like a great pair of secateurs closing. They must have cut us off from our rear…

3

…IT reminds me of six months ago when they’d just cut us off from our rear. We must be completely surrounded now but it’s not summer any more. Cockily we still have some food and ammunition. We have to take it in turns to do guard duty every two hours; it gets tiring. The others take the uniforms from our chaps when they capture them and dress up like us and we have to take care. And on top of that we have no more electric light and shells are coming at us from all sides at once. for the moment we’re trying to make contact with the rearguard again. They’ll have to send us planes, we’re starting to run out of cigarettes. There’s a lot of noise outside. Something must be brewing. You don’t even have time to take your helmet off anymore.

4

Something was brewing. Four tanks got almost right up to where we are. I saw the first one as I went out. It stopped immediately. A grenade had smashed one of its tracks which suddenly unrolled with a terrible rattling noise. But a little thing like that didn’t stop its gun. We got a flamethrower. The annoying thing about those is that you have to split the turret of the tank open before you use the flamethrower, otherwise it just exploded like a chestnut and the blokes inside are undone. Three of us set about cutting open the turret with a hacksaw but two other tanks arrived and we had to blow it up without cutting it open. The second one blew up as well and the third turned around, but it was a trick because it came at us in reverse; and we were quite surprised up to see them shooting at their own men who were following behind. They sent us a dozen 88mm shells as a birthday present. we’ll have to rebuild the house if we want to use it again, but it will be quicker to get another one. We finally got rid of this third tank by loading a bazooka with sneezing powder and the people inside banged their heads on the armour plating so hard that they were all dead when we got them out. Only the driver was still just alive, but he’d got his head inextricably caught in the steering apparatus, so rather than spoil the tank, which was quite O.K., we cut his head off. Motorcyclists with light machine guns came up in the wake of the tank making a terrible din but we managed to finish them off thanks to an old reaper-binder. During this time we also got some bombs dropped on us and even an aeroplane which our own ack-ack had just shot down unintentionally, as it was supposed to be shooting at the tanks. We lost Simon, Morton, Buck and P.C. from the company and we still have the others and one of Slim’s arms.

5

Still surrounded. It’s now been raining for two days without stopping. The roof has only one tile left out of every two but the raindrops fall just in the right places and we’re not really wet. We have absolutely no idea how long this will last. We still go on patrols but it’s quite difficult to look through a periscope when you haven’t been trained for it and it’s exhausting to stay with mud over your head for more than a quarter of an hour. Yesterday we met another patrol. We didn’t know if it was ours or the opposition’s but in any case there was no danger in firing under mud because you couldn’t hurt each other. The rifles just fall apart at once. We’ve tried everything to get rid of the mud. We’ve even poured petrol on it; burning makes it dry out, but afterwards you scorch your feet when you walk on it. the real answer of course is to dig until you come to solid earth, but it’s even more difficult to go on patrols in solid earth than it is in mud. I suppose we’ll just about get used to it in the end. The drag is that there’s so much of it it’s started to become tidal. Just now it’s all right, it’s up to the fence, but unfortunately it will pretty soon be up to the first floor again and that it unpleasant.

6

A nasty thing happened to me this morning. I was in the shed behind our old hovel preparing a nice surprise for two blokes you could see quite clearly through binoculars in the process of trying to pick us off. I had a little 81 mortar and I was setting it up in a pram, then Johnny was going to disguise himself as a peasant woman to push it, but first of all the mortar fell on my foot. In itself that’s no more than the sort of thing that keeps happening to me just at the moment, but then, while I was on the ground holding my foot, the thing went off and one of those winged objects exploded on the second floor right in the captain’s piano while he was playing ‘Jada’. It made a terrible noise and the piano was blown to pieces, but the worst thing was that nothing happened to the captain, at least not enough to stop him from handing out a good hiding. Luckily an 88mm shell landed in the same room immediately afterwards. He didn’t realize that they’d aimed at the smoke caused by the first explosion and he thanked me, saying I’d saved his life by making him come downstairs. Personally I wasn’t the least bit interested because of my two broken teeth and also because all his bottles were kept just under the piano.

We’re more hemmed in than ever right now. We’re being bombarded incessantly from all sides. Luckily the weather is starting to clear up. now it only rains nine hours out of every twelve. We can count on a plane bringing reinforcements in a month’s time. we’ve got three days’ rations left.

7

The planes have started to send us things by parachute. I had a big disappointment when I opened the first parcel – there was a great load of medical supplies in it. I exchanged them with the doctor for two bars of nut chocolate (the real thing, not the rubbish you get with your rations) and had a bottle of cognac. But he got his own back when he treated me for my squashed foot. I had to give him back the cognac, otherwise at the time of writing I’d only have one foot left. The engines are starting to drone overhead again. There’s a break in the clouds and they’re sending us more parachutes, only this time it seems there are men on them.

8

They were men. Two of them are real comics. Apparently they spent the whole flight practicing judo holds on each other, thumping each other and rolling under the seats. They jumped out at the same time and played at cutting he cords on each other’s parachutes with knives. Unfortunately the wind separated them so they had to continue the contest with rifles. I’ve rarely seen such good shots. Soon we’re going to bury them – they were a bit too high up when they fell.

9

We’re surrounded. Our tanks came back and the opposition couldn’t take it. I couldn’t fight properly because of my foot but I cheered my mates on. It was great. I had a good view from the window and the parachutists who arrived yesterday fought like demons. I now have a scarf made out of parachute silk. It’s green and yellow on a brown background and goes very well with the colour of my beard. But tomorrow I’ll shave for my convalescent leave. I was so excited that I threw a brick at Johnny’s head because he’d just missed one and now I have two more teeth missing. This war is no good at all for teeth.

10

Habit dulls the senses. I said so to Huguette (that’s the sort of absurd name they have) while I was dancing with her at the Red Cross Centre, and she replied:

‘You’re a hero’

But I didn’t have time to think of a good answer because Mac tapped me on the shoulder so I had to give her to him. The others were all badly spoken and the orchestra there played much too fast. My foot still bothers me a little but in a fortnight it will be all over and we’ll be off again. I landed with a girl from back home but our uniform material’s too thick; that too dulls the senses. There are a lot of girls here. They do understand what you say to them, which is embarrassing, but really there’s not much you can do with them. I went out and I soon found a lot of others, not the same type, more understanding, but it’s five hundred francs minimum and even then only because I’m wounded. It’s funny, these ones have German accents.

Afterwards I lost Mac and drank a lot of cognac. This morning I have a terrible headache where the M.P. hit me. I’ve no money left because at the end of the evening I bought some French cigarette from an English officer and I really paid through the nose for them. I’ve just thrown them away. They’re disgusting things. He was right to get rid of them.

11

When you leave the Red Cross shops with a box to put your cigarettes, soap, sweets and newspapers in they follow you in the street with their eyes and I don’t understand why, for they must sell their cognac at a good enough price to be able to buy these things for themselves for themselves and their women aren’t cheap either. My foot is almost completely better. I don’t think I’ll be able to stay here much longer. I sold some cigarettes so that I can go out a bit and then I borrowed some from Mac, but he doesn’t like parting with them.

I’m beginning to get bored. This evening I’m going to the cinema with Jacqueline. I met her last night at the club, but I don’t think she’s very bright because she’s always pushing my hand away and she doesn’t move when she dances. The soldiers here really get on my nerves. They’re far too slovenly and no two of them are wearing the same uniform. Anyway, there’s nothing to do but wait for this evening.

12

Back again. Even so, it was less boring in town. We’re advancing very slowly. Every time we finish preparing the guns we send out a patrol and every time one of the chaps on the patrol comes back shot up by a sniper. So we start preparing the guns again, we send out the planes, they flatten everything and then two minutes later the snipers start shooting again. Just now the planes are coming back. I can count seventy-two of them. they’re not very big planes but then the village is small. From here you can see the bombs spiralling down and they make rather a muffled noise with nice columns of dust. We’re going to attack again soon but we have to send out a patrol first. Just my luck, I’m on it. there’s about one and a half kilometres to go on foot and I don’t like walking so far, but in this war you never have any choice. We pile in behind the debris of the first houses: I don’t think there’s a single one left standing from one end of the village to the other. There don’t seem to be many of the inhabitants left either and the ones we do see make strange faces (when they’ve managed to keep them) but they ought to understand that we can’t risk losing men to save them and their houses; most of the time they’re very old and useless houses anyway. And besides it’s the only way for our people to clear the place. Most of them do understand this anyhow, even though some of them seem to think it isn’t the only way. After all, it does concern them and perhaps they were attached to their houses, though they must be less so now they’re in their present condition.

I continue on my patrol. I’m last again, it’s wiser, and the leader has just fallen into a bomb crater full of water. He comes out of it with his helmet full of leeches. He also brought out a fat and astounded fish. On the way back Mac taught it to sit up and beg, and it turns out it doesn’t like chewing gum.

13

I’ve just received a letter from Jacqueline. She must have given it to another chap to put in the post because it came in one of our envelopes. She really is a strange girl, but then all girls probably have funny ideas. We’ve retreated a bit since yesterday, but tomorrow we’ll be advancing again. Still the same completely flattened villages: it’s really depressing. We’ve found a brand new radio set. They’re just trying it out. I don’t know if you really can replace a valve with a bit of candle. I think so. I can hear it playing ‘Chattanooga’. I danced it with Jacqueline shortly before I left the other place. I think I’ll reply to her if I have time. now it’s Spike Jones; I like his music too and I wish everything was all over so that I could buy myself a tie with blue and yellow stripes in civvy street.

14

We’ll leaving very soon. We’re near the front again and the shells are starting to come at us once more. It’s raining, it’s not very cold, the jeep’s working well. We’re gong to get out of it to go on foot.

They say it’s beginning to feel as if the end is near. I don’t know what makes them think that but I’d like to try and get out of it with as little trouble as possible. There are still places where you can get into bad difficulties. You can’t tell what it’s going to be like.

I’ve got some more leave coming in a fortnight and I’ve written to Jacqueline and told her to wait for me. perhaps I shouldn’t have. You mustn’t get involved.

15

I’m still standing on the mine. We’d set off this morning on patrol and I was last as usual. They all passed to the side of it but I felt the click under my foot and I stopped dead. They only go off when you lift your foot. I’ve thrown what I had in my pockets to the others and told them to go away. I’m all alone. I ought to wait for them to come back, but I’ve told them not to come back, and I could try and throw myself flat on my stomach, but I’d hate to live without legs… I’ve only kept my notebook and pencil. I’m going to throw them away before I move onto the other leg and I shall have to do this soon because I’ve had enough of the war and because I’m getting pins and needles.